Constant Complainer...Don't be that

It is completely OK to complain about things that make you uncomfortable. 

But do you complain about everything or only things that make you uncomfortable?

Unfortunately, for a lot of us complaining is simply a habit than a necessity.

When we are young everything is new and we are eager to absorb it all. In adulthood, we get used to things. We avoid new things because they seem “difficult”, when in fact only by cracking “difficult” we can move forward in life. That is the only way a child can learn new things.

In many cases, we have no other choice but to take on the task on hand, no matter how difficult, and solve it. All children do just that. Only difference is that they don’t complain, they do what they have to do without complaining too much. Adults on the other hand, almost always complain more and focus less on the real task. 

Again, it is completely OK to complain about things that make you uncomfortable but it is not OK to complain about most of the things.

Complaining attracts more things to complain about. If we stop complaining about small unfortunate incidents we will avoid big unfortunate incidents. Everything we experience is a reflection of how we are feeling. 

When a small thing goes wrong, acknowledge it and appreciate it as it has warned you to immediately shift your consciousness or pattern of thinking towards gratitude. Feeling gratitude for small things will bring you more to be grateful for.

Stay away from people who complain a lot. They are like perpetrators who want you to feel sorry for them. They don’t want solution; they simply want your attention.

Know how to differentiate between a genuine complain as opposed to a plea for attention.

A genuine complaint comes out of a specific situation. It makes someone feel uncomfortable because it is out of norm. 

A person who complains constantly about everything never feels uncomfortable about what he or she went through because it is not out of norm, it is something that they always feel. It is out of a habit, not out of a situation.

Be a sympathetic ear to those who have genuine complaints. Sometimes all they need is a good listener so that they can get it off their chest. 

However, stay away from constant complainers. They will get you into the same bad habit. Make some excuses to avoid them. Shift your focus towards gratitude and love to attract happy people.

Remember that every moment in your life is too precious to please others. Live your life to the fullest. If you don’t like something change it, if you can’t change it then accept it and get over it.

Love yourself regardless of a situation. Situations go and come, love is forever…

You are Unique, just like everyone else…

It is a human quality to judge everything. It helps us avoid danger and find safety.

This great quality often gets misused when we start judging other people to make ourselves feel better. This only means that we cannot feel better about ourselves unless others are miserable. But more importantly, it means that we judge ourselves in negative manner, by comparing ourselves to others.

Why do we judge ourselves when we cannot be danger to ourselves? It is a reflection of insecurities.

The best way to love yourself is to know that you are unique. You cannot be compared to anyone else. Your peers, siblings, colleagues, or whoever there is, they are all different in every possible way and you cannot compare yourself to them.

Very often, we say, “I haven’t achieved anything” but in fact, we have. Under the circumstances, we have done our best.

Don’t get me wrong. It does not mean that you can be lazy and think that you have done your best. Then, you must motivate yourself to do better because you want to accomplish something.

The problem arises when we say, “I haven’t achieved anything compare to XYZ who is my age or younger”.

Please do not compare yourself with anyone at all. We all come through different paths of life and respond to situations in different ways. Our response comes from our belief system. When we have positive beliefs we can respond positively but when we don’t have positive beliefs we cannot respond positively. Which is why, some people fail and some people succeed.

One of the easiest ways to love ourselves is to give up comparing. Know that everybody has different background. Everybody is unique. When you stop comparing, you stop judging. Judgmental behavior causes separation. By giving up comparison and judgments you achieve acceptance and unconditional love.

Affirmations for accepting uniqueness:

I am Unique

I see uniqueness in others

There is no comparison

I respect and value the differences in life

I love variety

Variety causes evolution so that life can be better

I am authentic

I am wonderful

I have positive beliefs

I value myself

I express myself clearly

I am worthy

When you look at a person, any person, remember that everyone has a story. Everyone has gone through something that has changed them.

Sometimes people hurt more than they can handle… And sometimes they don’t know how to ask for help. They’re so caught up in their own pain, they end up hurting everyone around them.



— Rebecca Donovan, Barely Breathing

6 ways to attract Happiness NOW

1.     Forgive: It is easier said than done but it has to be done. When we forgive, we release ourselves from the past. We let go of what could be and focus on what can be. If it is very hard to forgive then think of a time when you sincerely apologized to someone, did you hope that they would forgive? Imagine forgiving yourself at that moment. If you can be easy on yourself, you can be easy on others. Happiness is more important than holding grudges.

2.     Be grateful: Grateful for what you have brings you more things to be grateful for. It is the attitude that makes you humble and receptive of generosity of this Universe. Everyday count 5 new things to be grateful for and see the difference in your daily mood. Do this the first thing in the morning and set the positive tone for the day. When things get really tough, don’t forget to be grateful for your health, family, home, love or whatever things that you take for granted such as your bed, shower, pillow, phone, bathroom, fan, comb, toothbrush, literally anything, anything will do. Be happy for small things and big things will appear.

3.   Stop regretting: No matter how bad your decision was, there is nothing you can do to change it now. Stop regretting things that you did in the past. This relates to forgiving. Forgive your past. Easiest way to stop regretting is focusing on the present moment. If you could make a fresh start, wouldn’t you? Nobody is stopping you. In fact, starting it again is only admirable. Focusing on present is no easy task but that is why we meditate. Meditate at least 5 minutes a day. You can even meditate in a  or bus, just not in the car while driving .  Here is a 5 minute meditation practice: Close your eyes, and breathe deeply. If you are not home then you may not want to breathe deeply but normal breathing can be good enough too. Breathe once and count 1, breathe second time and count 2, continue until you reach the number 10. Once you reach the number 10, cross one finger and repeat the process until your 5 fingers are crossed. There you have it, a quick meditation. You can repeat the process for 2-3 times. Once finished, gently open your eyes. It is easy and can be done anywhere.

4.     Be nice: I have heard many times that people take advantage of your niceness so you need to step up your game and be a b*tch. Oh, only if you knew that karma is a real b*tch and nothing gets unnoticed –small or big. We are all individuals and were raised in different environments so it is obvious that we will not get along with everyone. But that does not mean you need to mean to other people.

Be nice to your enemies. Some people might be jealous of you or resent you for whatever reason, you cannot feel the same way about them. Even when you know that someone do not have good intentions for you, be nice to them. That is your greatest strength. Let karma take care of them and you take control of your own life. If you believe in Law of Attraction then by being nice you will keep attracting nice people. Even if you attract mean people once in a while, practice being nice to them and you will soon open up many doors.

Be nice to strangers. When you see elders or pregnant women, offer your seat. Put a quarter in an expired meter, smile to a fellow commuter, let a hurried driver go before your, let someone go first before your turn, give a penny or two to the person who is standing before you in the checkout register, give a sincere compliment. There are many ways to give and even more ways to receive back. Feel the magic of giving something without any expectations – ah, that moment is the best of all.

Be nice to yourself. You can never have compassion for others without having compassion for yourself. Be nice to yourself. If you spill the milk, you are not a complete idiot, you just had an accident and it is fixable. If you missed the train, you were not walking or driving too slow, you just missed a train, there is nothing else about it. If you made a mistake at work, you are not the first and you won’t be the last.

5.   Be yourself, be vulnerable: It hurts to be vulnerable, but being vulnerable is being you. You are taking a risk that someone will hurt you but you are also opening up universe’s channel that people will accept you for who you are. If we don’t want to get hurt then we should never go out because where else is safest than being home, in our bed, comfortable. However, staying home does not bring anything new and you certainly cannot find the fun and happiness that other people bring to you. Yes, it can mean that they may hurt you but it’s better to get hurt in search of fun than being lonely. I promise you that when you are ready to be yourself, you will attract those who love you for who you are. Your truth is more beautiful than you can imagine.

6.   Stop judging: Unless you are judge in an actual court please do not take responsibility of such a big task. It is normal to evaluate other people but making assumptions about them creates wall that doesn’t really exist. Wearing short skirt does not make anyone a slut and a being shy does not make anyone a dumb person. People can be insecure, just like you. Give them a chance to do or be what they want and accept them for who they are. Nobody talks behind you. If they do, it only means that you are worth talking about, take no offense for that. Judging stops you from being happy because you are too busy to find reasons to be sad about something.

Affirmations for Forgiveness

To download the affirmations for forgiveness click here

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“A team at the University of Pisa in Italy asked people to imagine forgiving someone and then observed changes in cerebral blood flow, which signaled the parts of the brain that became more active. They found that several regions "lit up," especially areas that regulate emotional responses, moral judgments, perceptions of physical pain, and decision making. By creating this kind of neural map, researcher   s hope to learn more about how forgiveness works on both a physical and a psychological level.

Read more: http://www.oprah.com/health/How-to-Forgive-Others-Health-Benefits-of-Forgiveness-Fred-Luskin/2#ixzz1op60paby”

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I am willing to forgive

I forgive myself and others

I choose to forgive

I am able to control my emotions

As I forgive, I become free

I let go of the expectations from others

I concentrate on goodness and kindness that I experience

I create my own path

I am in control of my life

No matter who does what, I always have choice over my feelings

I respond with kindness and compassion

I have learned my lessons and accept the fact that there is nothing that I can do to change the past but my future is still in my hand and it is bright

I am easy on myself

I am easy on others

Things are acceptable even if they are not perfect

The act of forgiveness takes place in our own mind. It really has nothing to do with the other person. – Louise Hay

I let go of the past and embrace my brilliant future

I am in charge

I release myself from the negative energy that was created through the past

I love and accept myself just the way I am

I bless my choices

I become wiser every day

I forgive myself

 The Forgiveness Affirmation Video: