Why Bad Things Happen to Good People?

When I first learned about the law of attraction, I wondered how a nice person can attract bad things. 

I thought that a good person is inherently a good person so his or thoughts can never bad. 

I now realize that there are no such things as good or bad. We have created these labels for our convenience. 

The law of attraction does not judge us. It only responds to the frequency of our thoughts. When we are vibrating on a frequency of being a victim, the law of attraction will bring us people who will make us feel like a victim. The law doesn’t say, “omg, Smita what are you doing, think something different” or “even though she is thinking thoughts of being a victim I will still bring her people who respect her”. The law does not label our thoughts; it simply brings them as a reality.

This is the reason bad things happen to good people. I recently met a person who does his best to serve others. He told me that all his life he served others. Unfortunately he thinks that people take advantage of his good nature without reciprocating. The law of attraction simply makes it a reality for him. If he believes that he is served by others as others serve him, his reality will reflect that.  

Our most important task is to pay attention to our thinking pattern. Even better would be to think as little as possible and to stay in the present moment. If silencing your mind is a too difficult task, at least think thoughts that bring you a positive reality.

In the core of us, we are neither good nor bad. We simply are. Things don’t happen to us, we attract them.

5 Es to Exceptional You

1. Express yourself: You are a channel through which Universe expresses itself. If you do not express, you are denying the truth that is within you. 

What is mean by expressing yourself? Expressing does not mean giving opinions. 

Expressing = accepting your feelings. It is about you. 

E.g. She is a bitch --> Opinion

I am angry at her because her actions made me feel bad --> Expressing

When others fail to fulfill our expectations we feel angry, resentful, envious, frustrated etc. 

We need to identify how we feel about certain issues and then release the emotions. 

Why?  Trapped emotions reflect through our bodies. Emotions = Energy. Energy needs to escape so it can be re-purposed. 

By releasing your emotions i.e. expressing yourself, you make space for new energy. If you are always angry, how can you ever be joyous? 

I do not mean you forget what happened. You consciously forgive others and yourself so you can move on. 

How to express yourself? When your partner says something hurtful or when your boss criticizes you, don’t bottle it up. I don’t mean scream at them right there and then. Remember that expressing yourself is about you, not them. 

When you are alone or with a trusted friend (a friend who does not judge you), let go of yourself completely. Imagine someone who has hurt you is with you and then scream at the person. Tell him or her how you feel. 

E.g. you were passed on for a promotion. When you are alone, imagine your boss is with you. Say, “Kristina (boss), I am so angry that you did not give me the promotion. I worked hard for 2 years and it feels like it did not matter at all. I feel very disappointed. I feel like I have been taken advantage of. I feel angry, resentful, betrayed and frustrated. How could you do this to me?” Think of all the emotions you are feeling and express them. If it helps, write them down but saying verbally feels so much better. Cry if you feel like it. You are not doing anything bad. You are releasing your emotions.

When you feel a little better then ask yourself what would make this situation better? Find a solution that gives you feelings of control and satisfaction (I don’t mean revenge). Can you look for another position? Can you ask for a transfer?  Was the other person, in fact, more eligible?

Sometimes when you talk to someone when they are not with you, they can still hear you. Maybe your boss will realize her mistake and promote you as well. 

Remember to express your positive emotions as well. Laugh with your heart and eyes. There is always something silly and funny going on. Lighten up your heart.  

2. Environment: Your environment brings your experiences. If you are constantly in negative emotion, your experiences will be similar. You can control your environment.

Consciously choose your surroundings. 

You adapt to your surroundings unless you are aware of it. Hanging out with a constant complainer may make you the same way. You do not have to ignore that person fearfully. 

When you are with a person who makes you feel bad simple observe him or her. Do not judge. Know that his or her experiences do not have to be true for you. Be a listening ear and nothing else. Don’t feel his or her feelings. When you do not give constant attention to complainers they tend to leave you alone so they can find someone who will feel bad for them.

3. Energize: Your sacred body and soul needs sacred energy.  

Your body loves you, love it back. 

Energize your body with nourishing foods and water. Eat for your body, not for your feelings. 

Physical exercise will release trapped emotions and toxins from your body.

Yoga will connect your mind and body with each other.

Energize your soul by expressing yourself as mentioned in the 1^st point.

Meditate regularly. Meditation connects you with the source. This is the strongest way to energize.

4. Experience: Do not judge your circumstances. Simply experience them. You do not know whether particular situation is good or bad. 

When someone gives you a gift, you think it is a good experience. You do not know that yet. The person who gives you the gift may have bad intentions for you but you do not know that. When you receive a gift, simply observe how you feel. Do you feel happy, appreciated, or loved?

When someone hurts you, you think it is a bad experience. You do not know that yet. Perhaps a small “bad” experience has saved you from a big “bad” experience. Observe how you feel. Do you feel betrayed, hopeless or disappointed? 

When you become an observer of your experience, you immediately connect to the source.

5. Evolve: Learn from your mistakes. Do not fret over them. Change habits that do not connect you with the source. Failure evolves you to success, so don’t be afraid to fail. 

Forgive and accept yourself. 

Read more, experience more and live more.

Why must you always trust your intuition?

Ever walk in the room full of people to feel their energy immediately? E.g.  You instantly know if the mood is light or serious. It is not by chance that we understand surroundings so quickly but thanks to our brain that absorbs data in a matter of a split second.

Our brain is always at work, even when we are asleep. Brain’s work is to protect us and it uses all the information from surroundings to give us the best possible solution under the circumstances.

This kind of power was needed in order to survive during the evolution.  

At any given point your brain is constantly gathering data from everywhere. Even a needle that fell and did not make any noise may not grab your attention but your brain has noted this action.

The human brain has about 100,000,000,000 (100 billion neurons)

Research ⁽¹⁾  shows that the brain has about 100 million MIPS (Million computer Instructions Per Second) worth of processing power while recent super-computers only has a few million MIPS worth in processor speed.

This is the reason when you feel that something is wrong even though you cannot point it out. It is the magical work of your protective brain that is giving you clues. 

When you are in a relationship with a wrong person, your brain picks up your partner’s body language and gives you cues to leave him or her alone. However, you may continue in the relationship because you have no proof except your instinct just to find out how right you were to begin with.

Although intuition is our greatest asset, we must differentiate it from fear. 

Fear based decisions do not feel right. Let’s say you are in a relationship that feels “not right”. There can be two scenarios. One is that your intuition has picked up many cues that you cannot see with your naked eyes. Second could be the fear that he or she will break your heart just like your previous partners. When you listen to your heart with intuition, following it feels good. So, you will feel rather calm when you consider leaving them for good. When you listen to your fear, you feel uneasy when you consider leaving them. Intuition feels natural. Intuition never hurts you, it makes you feel better. Fear hurts you. 

I cannot swim and every time I touch the water to learn swimming my brain senses the danger and immediately orders other body parts to struggle to come out of it. This is just a fear.

If I have a great swim instructor, let’s say someone I trust like my father, my intuition guides me to let go of the fear.

Intuition is like a muscle, it keeps getting  stronger as you practice. 

However, if you do not use your intuition it will stop coming to you: You use it or you lose it.

Of course, our brain can perceive wrong things from its surroundings and it is our job to keep things in perspective. This is where affirmations play important role. As our brain absorbs more positive thinking through affirmations it will be more intuitive than fearful.

^{(1) http://library.thinkquest.org/C001501/the_saga/compare.htm}

The above is my opinion only.   I do not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. In the event you use any of the information in this column for yourself, I do not accepts responsibility for your actions.

What if you could see through the truck?

On Saturday I went to my great friend’s amazing house. When I was walking to the train station I was afraid that I will miss the only train that could take me there. I was walking in fast pace and all of a sudden the red hand stopped me – NYC traffic light. 

I was in rush and I wanted to cross the street but I could not see if the cars were pulling in. There was a big red Coca-Cola truck parked on the street. It was hard to see beyond this fat truck. 

But I decided to take risk and slowly came forward to see if cars were coming. Sure enough there was no car coming, perfect time to cross the street without having the walk signal. 

I have crossed the street hundreds of times without having a walk signal. This time it was tough because of the truck, I was unable to see through it. 

I thought what if the truck was only my imagination? Let’s say that the truck represents our fear and doubts in life. If our fears and doubts are so big that we cannot see beyond them we will never take the first step to cross the street- to reach our dreams. We will be scared that anything can come from the other side, let’s just wait for the walk signal. But what if walk sign in life never comes. Will we be stuck on this side of the street? Unfortunately many people may think that at least it’s safe here and never take the first step.

Friends, I know it is hard to let go of the fears and doubts. It’s completely natural. In fact, our very survival depends on it. What if the cars were in fact coming, I could have lost my life in the rush. 

There is nothing wrong in being fearful and seeking safety. My point however is that even though there is fear; take the first step in the present moment.

Let your mind know that in the unknown territory, you can discover opportunities to live your dreams. Welcome your doubts, explain them that “I know this is the first time I will be doing this, but I would like to at least try it” and take that first step. 

Tomorrow, tell someone you love them, even though there may not be reciprocal. The friend who keeps insulting you, tell him that you need to set up boundaries. Tell your boss how much you appreciate his efforts and thank him (even though he will think you are acting crazy). Tell your neighbor to shut his dog. Say thank you to the police officer. Try at least one new thing- any new thing or look at something in a new way. Eat ice cream as if it’s a vegetable and eat vegetable as if its ice cream.

Small changes form habits. I have suggested small things but soon you will start seeing beyond the big truck of fear and doubt and start taking steps towards the pathway success!!

Affirmation for releasing fear and doubt: 

Everything I touch is a success

New pathways are opening up for me

I am safe wherever I go

I accept new ways and new perspectives in life

I can see everything clearly