Go with the Flow

“Notice that the stiffest tree is most easily cracked, while the bamboo or willow survives by bending with the wind.” – Bruce Lee

Do you ever feel that you are “stuck” in a situation?

The only time you can ever be stuck is when you hold on to things that no longer serve you. E.g. if you love your job, you enjoy working but you if you hate your job, you feel that you are stuck in your job.

We are never stuck. It is simply an illusion. Life is constantly changing then how can we feel that anything is stuck.

The only reason we feel stuck is that even though life is moving we are refusing to move with it. We are too afraid to let go. We hold on to what we have rather than embracing the change life is bringing to us.

Life is too short to play by rules. Take control of your own life. If you don’t like your job, it does mean that you need to quit it right away but you can start looking for a new job. Using law of attraction, you can visualize what would you like to have in your current job or simply ask for a new job. It may not be very easy at first but with time and being aligned with your desires you can manifest anything.

Nothing can ever be constant, everything is always changing. The Multiverse is constantly expanding, earth keeps rotating, grass keeps growing, our bodies change, our kids grow, our hair, nails and even the smallest atoms in our cells are changing then why are you holding on to the things?

Sometimes we refuse the changes because they are uncomfortable but sometimes we refuse them simply because they are new.  So, even if something better is happening, we hate it because we are not used to it.

When a corporation implements any new computer system to automate manual process, employees hate the new system. Not because it’s bad but because it’s new. Gradually they like it but the initial reaction is almost always negative.

However, kids react differently to life changes. They love new toys. Once we buy them something new they play with it until newer toys arrive. Kids never say no to newer toys or games. Even if they play with older ones, they will still embrace the new ones with enthusiasm.

As kids, it is easier for us to learn new things not because we are young but because our brains are in constant learning mode. Everything from learning to walk to watching a new cartoon show, we are constantly facing new things. Our brain has no option but to keep up with all of it. As we grow older we are seeing the same things again and again and our brain slows down. And then it feels so stuck.

Stress is nothing but our reaction to the changes we face.  Instead of getting stressed over the things that we cannot control, we simply need to let go of those things and move on.

Lastly, never stay stuck because someone else is. If a friend is being too rigid to try new things, it is time to find a new friend who would. It may sound unkind but energy around you should stay flowing so that you can flow with life.

Do It Anyway

The hardest thing to do is to begin. We often plan things in our mind but rarely take actions. We are too consumed in daily lives of what is than what can be.

Can it be because we are lazy?

No, we are not lazy. We wake up every day even when we don’t feel like it, dress ourselves and our kids, go to work or school and come back home. By no means that can be called lazy.

I believe that real reason that we do not take actions is that deep within us lies fear. This fear stops us from doing something new or unusual because it might be scary. We feel safer where we are because at least we are familiar with the feelings.

There are two types of fear. Fear of failure and fear of success.

Fear of failure: This is a learned fear. I believe that fear of failure is learned through our parents. It is hard for adults to learn swimming because adults are more fearful of unknown situations compare to children, who are always eager to try new things.

As we grow older, we observe our parents or surrounding adults talking about failure in negative way and assume that this is a legit fear. If adults surrounding us did not respond to their failure positively we learned that it is bad to fail. Failing is not bad. Never trying is bad. Never taking a risk is bad.

When we do something we are bound to make mistakes. But taking no action is the worst mistake. We are bound to miss 100% of the chances we never we take.

Fear of success: Fear of success protects us from being in limelight. It is uneasy for many people to even receive a compliment. They are afraid that by being the focus they are attracting unwanted attention from enemies (due to our evolution process- lion eats the person who is in the front not the ones in group).

It is not easy to get rid of any of the fear and you shouldn’t. As I said, fear is here to protect us, it guides us. That feeling you get when you know you need to run away from danger is fear. It is only trying to protect you. It’s not only good thing, it is an amazing thing.

Every time we encounter fear before taking an action, we need to convince ourselves that there is no danger in doing it. E.g. at first you might be afraid to swim but under a trained instructor you can convince yourself that nothing bad can happen to you, you will always be protected by your instructor. If protection is taken care by instructor, fear can rest and you can finally take the first step in a swimming pool.

No matter how scared you feel to do something, do it anyway. People who succeed feel the same fear but they take actions anyway.

Taking the first step might be harder but once you get started you know your journey will end one day. You might fail but you might as well succeed.

No matter the outcome, taking the first step is already a victory.

Failure is only an illusion, with every failure there is one less attempt to try.

Success is also an illusion. Success is not just an award in a ceremony; it is the satisfaction you feel in your heart knowing that you had enough courage to go beyond your fears. You untangled the web of fear and through it you made a quantum leap into the web of actions.

Every action has a reaction; it is only matter of time when your seed will grow the first root. Remember root is within soil, you cannot see it until first sprout comes out but you know that it is there. Have patience.

Never ever stop taking actions because every time you start something you have changed this world just a bit.

You are Unique, just like everyone else…

It is a human quality to judge everything. It helps us avoid danger and find safety.

This great quality often gets misused when we start judging other people to make ourselves feel better. This only means that we cannot feel better about ourselves unless others are miserable. But more importantly, it means that we judge ourselves in negative manner, by comparing ourselves to others.

Why do we judge ourselves when we cannot be danger to ourselves? It is a reflection of insecurities.

The best way to love yourself is to know that you are unique. You cannot be compared to anyone else. Your peers, siblings, colleagues, or whoever there is, they are all different in every possible way and you cannot compare yourself to them.

Very often, we say, “I haven’t achieved anything” but in fact, we have. Under the circumstances, we have done our best.

Don’t get me wrong. It does not mean that you can be lazy and think that you have done your best. Then, you must motivate yourself to do better because you want to accomplish something.

The problem arises when we say, “I haven’t achieved anything compare to XYZ who is my age or younger”.

Please do not compare yourself with anyone at all. We all come through different paths of life and respond to situations in different ways. Our response comes from our belief system. When we have positive beliefs we can respond positively but when we don’t have positive beliefs we cannot respond positively. Which is why, some people fail and some people succeed.

One of the easiest ways to love ourselves is to give up comparing. Know that everybody has different background. Everybody is unique. When you stop comparing, you stop judging. Judgmental behavior causes separation. By giving up comparison and judgments you achieve acceptance and unconditional love.

Affirmations for accepting uniqueness:

I am Unique

I see uniqueness in others

There is no comparison

I respect and value the differences in life

I love variety

Variety causes evolution so that life can be better

I am authentic

I am wonderful

I have positive beliefs

I value myself

I express myself clearly

I am worthy