Annoying Coworkers!!

The annoying coworkers!!

Yes they are not just mythical creatures, they are the real deal.  You have to face them, no matter where you go. You see, annoying coworkers are same everywhere but somehow we uniquely feel victimized.  Let’s be real, as long as you work in this real world, you will have them.

Jeez, does that mean we have to be annoyed all the time. Well, as everything in life is made of choices, you have a choice either be annoyed or releasing the pattern of being annoyed.

The truth is that everybody in the world is annoying. Yes including you and me. Only difference is that some annoyance can be tolerated and some cannot.

Your children, for example, are in fact very annoying – no? Maybe not to you but there annoyance is tolerable and even appreciated by you. On the other hand, the constantly barking next door dog is annoying and it is unacceptable.

A lot of our family members are annoying and we get annoyed by them but we still want to live with them because we love them.

Annoying coworkers are tolerated but not by choice. However I believe that they can be tolerated if you change your perspective.

First, remember that there is nobody with whom you can get along perfectly. Your spouse/partner probably has some habit that you hate but you tolerate it because there are other traits that you admire more.

Similarly, think of things that you actually appreciate about your annoying coworkers. You may hate your coworker for always picking his nose (gross… I know) but he may be a good worker who always comes in early.

Second, remember that everybody was born great but then life happened. Not everybody was raised the way you did. Their cultures, traditions, and acceptable and unacceptable habits are different that yours. Respect the difference even if you hate it.

If you cannot stand the person then talk to them directly. Explain them that they are a wonderful person but their particular habit makes it hard for you to completely appreciate them. Be prepared to get some backfire if the person you are dealing with is not only annoying but also has not completely matured as an adult. Or, just play this scenario in your head and speak to their higher self. You know that the dust on the gold does not make it less valuable, all you have to do is remove the dust. Unfortunately, you can only remove your own dusts. Clean that dusts from your eyes and look at that annoying coworker with neutrality. I say neutrality because although looking at them with love can help tremendously, it is almost impossible to love someone suddenly when you hate them or their habits.

If you can, change your seats or put a calendar between them and you. If you can complain anonymously to your HR department then you should. E.g. listening to radio loud or keep spitting in the trash can are unacceptable habits.

Remember that being annoying is different than being unprofessional. No unprofessional act should be tolerated as it can be a liability to your company.

Repeat the following affirmations to get along with all of your coworkers:

My coworkers are easy to get along with

My work place is productive and fun

All my coworkers are professional and act in professional manner

I enjoy my workplace

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My friends, every moment matters and this is the moment when you have decided that you do not have to work with people who do not appreciate you. But this is also a moment to remember that you have attracted this situation. What sort of feelings did you emit to attract this kind of coworker? This is not your fault but by taking the responsibility for attracting things in your life, you take the control to change them.

This is the moment to take control in your work space. Your work space is divine because it has YOU in it. You feel grateful to come to work every day. You receive fair compensation for what you do. You have probably made some amazing friends in this place. You are thrilled to have a job that requires your services. You are needed. This place is better because of you. It is same with your coworkers. You may not be able to see or feel it. However, at some point they were thrilled to have this job but now it is just a routine for them. More than doing what they love they do their job because if they don’t, they will get fired. The fear or ego has replaced the excitement and love for this divine place. But don’t feel sad. There is nothing you can do about their perspective. They are in control of their lives and you are of your own.

Think good things about your job. May it be having your own voicemail or working in the loving neighborhood. Maybe it is the convenience from home or the pay check. Maybe it is one of your coworker or the satisfaction you receive from giving your services.

Do not do lousy job because nobody is appreciating it. Remember that you are always giving out feelings that will attract more of it. So give out feelings that someone IS appreciating your work. Your work is always recognized positively. In the meetings you are prepared, you are the star. People come to you not because they want your help but because they want to learn from you. How can you be such so happy, positive and productive in the depressing environment? Because you can. Because you made a choice.  Because you are in control of your own life, not your coworkers. Soon you will find that you will attract people of your own caliber. And even if you don’t, you know you that nothing and nobody can stop you from living every moment to the fullest and you certainly know how ;).

Forgiveness!!

As a firm believer in Law of Attraction, I believe that everything in my life is attracted by me. Sometimes I attract joy and sometimes I attract sadness. However, this does not mean that I should keep feeling guilty about bad situations in my life. When someone disrespects me, it does not automatically mean that I have no respect for myself but that somewhere I felt “not good enough”. This feeling my not have lasted for very long time but it was there for a few moment.

Sometimes we do things without realizing its effect. E.g. you may steal paper clips from your work, thinking nobody cares but when you realize that someone has stolen something that is important to you, you care. You don’t immediately connect two situations but there may be a correlation. When you steal something from your, no matter how small, you are telling the Universe that you cannot afford a little bit of consideration towards your workplace and you do not have enough money to buy such petty things. Your feelings will return to you multifold. Someone may steal your valuables without considering your feelings. These valuables don’t have to be money or material things; they can be your feelings. So next time when you get hurt, ask yourself what feelings you gave out to attract this situation? Did you steal petty things or someone’s pride without considering the consequences?

Everybody has a choice to think and to act in whichever way they please. When someone has done wrong to you they have exercised their right to choose. It’s rather unfortunate that they did not consider your feelings. However, now it is done, whatever it was - it’s already done to you. There is nothing that you can do to change that. You can take revenge but that will not “fix” the situation or take you back in time when it had not happened. It has happened, just like that. You have attracted it but it is not your fault.

So what do you do now? If you are a spiritual person, you may feel, well only thing to do is to forgive. Yes. Forgiveness is necessary but it is very difficult. It is hard to forgive someone who has done unjust to you. It was not fair to you. Nobody should be able to get away with what happened to you.

But forgiveness does not mean that you are accepting what happened it only means that you are releasing yourself from that situation. Unfortunately, it is difficult to forgive and release yourself or the other person freely.

I believe that as a human being with feelings, directly forgiving someone after an unfair incident should not be expected. So, please don’t feel bad for hating the person who did wrong to you. It is normal. The best way to move past something is to go through it. You cannot cross the river without going in it first. You can build a bridge but you will still see the river. River isn’t going anywhere as long as you want to pass it, no matter how you pass it.

In order to move past any bad experience, the first step is to acknowledge that you did not deserve the wrongdoing. Nobody deserves it.

Next is to remember some simple points:

It is OK to be angry. By being angry, you are expressing your feelings. You are NOT a bad person for feeling this way. You are a wonderful person who deserves nothing but love and joy.

Don’t try to forgive the person just yet.

Think of the situation that happened, I know you want to forget it, but think about it anyway.

Let’s say someone stole your idea at work or someone molested you in the bus or your father beat you when you were only 5. All these situations are terrible, unfortunately worse has happened to people and they are the real deals on this Earth.

Look at the scene as a third person. See your face and expressions. Feel the anxiety or fear you were feeling at that time. Now tell your old self:  “You are going to be just fine. Don’t mind the other person who is being wrong. He or she does not know you the way I do. You are going to forget about it soon. The future will NOT be affected because of this incident. Everything is always in our hands.” Try to send love into that situation, specifically to yourself. Now forgive YOURSELF for being in that situation. Remind yourself that this could not have been avoided. There is no need to feel guilty about it anymore. What happened was wrong but now you have moved on. The future life is still good.

Now release the feeling of shame and guilt. More than angry at the person who did wrong to you, you are angry at yourself. Release your anger slowly. Remember that this situation did not change your future. Your future is still safe and waiting for you.

Now think of your present life. What is it that you can do today? Right now? Can you start over?

Yes, we can always start over. The sun always comes out in the morning.

At the end, you don’t need to forgive the other person because apparently he or she did not even affect your life. You are in control of your life and not the other person. Whatever happened was an experience. Life is full of experiences – some good and some bad. You had a bad experience and now it is gone. You have learned what needed to learn and moved on.

Only person you ever need to forgive is yourself. When you practice the above steps you will realize that there is no need to forgive others because they were unable change anything in your life. Yes what they did was wrong but you will not suffer because of them. You are sensible and you will take sensible steps to prevent that from happening again.  

My friends, every moment matters and this is the moment when you have decided to let go of the past. Congratulations for that. Live your life to the fullest. Nothing can and nothing will hold you back. You are so amazing that sometimes you amaze yourself. You are a true gift to the world; you did not come here by chance. This world needed you. Whether you realize it or not, this world would have never been same without you. You are here now; you know your true worth. Even if your had forgotten about it for a little while, you remember it now. In this moment you are determining to live your life to the fullest. You do that by not laying low but by being yourself, by expressing yourself and by converting your ideas into inspirations, inspirations into actions and actions into inspirations to others. And most importantly, by forgiving and moving on.

The challenging life - growing life

If you are a normal human being, you always have some challenges going on in your life. Challenges can be big such as finding a job or small such as getting late to your job due to heavy traffic or cancelled train.

Challenges are part of our lives. We don’t always need them but we still have them. We can sure do without losing our job or getting late to work. But how sure are we?

How can we be sure that we don’t need challenges? Nobody has seen the future. There is no time machine yet. So why is it that as soon as we face a challenge we think of it is as a bad thing? There are many evolutionary reasons for that. Our ancestors had to face tremendous challenges just to be safe and in all fairness it was very burdensome. Every time they had wild animals following them, it was in fact a bad thing. However, our ancestors soon discovered fire and other ways to get rid of the wild animals. They also discovered tools that could actually scare the wild animals. Total turnaround, isn’t it?

If there was no darkness we wouldn’t have discovered light – candles and then electricity. Wooh really big discoveries there! Electricity not only help us get rid of the darkness it has changed our existence, the appliances we use to our make our lives easier is just a quick example.

We are all part of this humanity that never stops thinking. And you see, even if you want to, you can’t help but think about things to make your life better. Sometimes it seems that challenges have come in your life just to annoy you but in fact YOU have summoned them.

As a firm believer in law of attraction, I believe that whatever you keep thinking about is what you will summon in your life. So if you keep thinking about making your life better, you are summoning situations to make your life better. Sometimes it can happen that you get a promotion in your job but sometimes you might get fired. The second scenario may look terrible but it can force you to find even better job or start your own business or change your trade to something you love or any other great situation.

It is normal and necessary to go into panic when challenges come in your life. It is our inheritance from our ancestors, our survival instincts.

When you face a challenge, accept it. Affirm that whatever will happen will help you grow in your life. Even if you want to give up, face it. Remember that only by determining that you will face a challenge, you can come up with a solution otherwise you will keep finding ways to run away. You WILL find your fire and face the wild animal, not only chasing it away but making it scared of you.

Everything in life keeps changing and moving, whether you like it not. Be part of the flow than resisting it and getting hurt. Embrace your future – no matter how worse it may seem because it never is. It is only your perception. This very challenge can be the stepping stone in you becoming who you were meant to be. 

No matter how small the challenge is, getting stuck in traffic can rarely be seen as something productive but since you summoned it, take advantage of it. Maybe call someone you didn’t call because you were too busy. Enjoy the sky. Meditate for a few minutes.

Don’t get me wrong, you can’t always be cool throughout your challenges but if you stay angry and frustrated you can never find the solution because you are focusing on past rather than present or future. It is impossible to change the past and therefore you cannot change the situation by focusing on it.

Here is the step by step guide to face your challenge successfully:

1. Once you let all of your emotions pass through you – anger, frustration, panic, for about 10-15 minutes, accept the challenge that you are facing

2. Affirm that “whatever will happen, it will help me grow”

3. You are perfectly capable of facing any challenge and it is only your perception that it is unnecessary; say that “it could be my stepping stone in becoming who I really am”

4. You are worthy of relaxing life, affirm to accept it now. You have power of present moment and you are using it wisely. Miracles happen every day and you are ready to create one in your life

5. Life is great, every moment matters and this is the moment that can define your life

Being Positive or Being Realistic?

I often receive remarks that I am too positive. As much as I would like to take it as a compliment, I know happy people can be annoying to people who are not so happy.

So am I really a positive person? The answer is yes because I have found out that this is the only realistic way to live a peaceful life.

We go through the day with too much drama and baggage. This person did not do this or he or she did this to me. He is so mean. She is a bitch. Customer service at some store sucks. Trains are too late. 

I understand things happen and we feel aggravated. It is normal. What’s not normal is to stay stuck in negative emotions. We must move on after every experience. Life is ever changing, nothing is steady. When you stay stuck, you stink - like stagnated water. Only flowing water tastes good.

Let’s say you made a mistake in your exam or at your work. Now you can either fix it or keep feeling negative about what just happened. I know that you cannot fix your mistake in the exam, but you can learn from it. You can try to understand what went wrong and fix it to get a better score in your final. If you choose to be sad about the mistake you made but never really move on to study harder, you are not a happy person. But if you said, “I am going to get it right next time” then you are one happy camper – a positive person.

If you know that your colleague made a mistake on something obvious then you can either humiliate him or her or just try to correct the error, really find the solution. If you keep blaming him or her you will only add insult to injury, nothing else. He or she will feel miserable. You will burn your blood and what else, oh yes, get some wrinkles due to the frowns; let’s hope it’s not increased blood pressure due to the stress.

If you decided not to stay happy or have hope for the future, what do you gain? Nothing. You will keep feeling miserable and will not enjoy what you have in front of you. You might miss the easy solutions. You will keep frowning and become very wrinkly ;) Your body cells will feel resentment and your face might become crooked. Your body will produce stress hormone (Cortisole) which will bring stubborn fat in your belly. 

The alternative is to be realistic. Acknowledge what happened is gone and there is nothing, by nothing I mean absolutely nothing that can be done to fix the past. If you keep dwelling on the past you are being unrealistic. 

Being realistic is to have some hope. Know that past is over and gone and so has its power. You have the power of NOW. Start changing things now ,before it becomes past. And what will that bring? Hmm… it will bring you solutions to so called problems, beautiful face, more creativity, longer healthy life, peace in your mind.

As my philosophy goes, feel the negative emotions but don't stay stuck in them. As a human being you will go through anger, guilt, sadness, depression etc. Key is to understand that these emotions are your guidelines to know that you must change the course of your actions. If something makes you sad, simply stop doing that. 

In a nutshell, there is no other way to live a peaceful life than being positive. If we keep thinking about past (or even future) and be miserable, we will stay miserable because past cannot be changed; there are no time machines so far. If we change our perspective to positive, no matter what the situation is we will be peaceful, calm and happy.

Don’t be too harsh on yourself no matter what. If you miss a train today, affirm that next train is coming soon. If you catch the train, affirm that you will get a seat soon. 

Be positive, it’s the only way to be realistic.

What if you could see through the truck?

On Saturday I went to my great friend’s amazing house. When I was walking to the train station I was afraid that I will miss the only train that could take me there. I was walking in fast pace and all of a sudden the red hand stopped me – NYC traffic light. 

I was in rush and I wanted to cross the street but I could not see if the cars were pulling in. There was a big red Coca-Cola truck parked on the street. It was hard to see beyond this fat truck. 

But I decided to take risk and slowly came forward to see if cars were coming. Sure enough there was no car coming, perfect time to cross the street without having the walk signal. 

I have crossed the street hundreds of times without having a walk signal. This time it was tough because of the truck, I was unable to see through it. 

I thought what if the truck was only my imagination? Let’s say that the truck represents our fear and doubts in life. If our fears and doubts are so big that we cannot see beyond them we will never take the first step to cross the street- to reach our dreams. We will be scared that anything can come from the other side, let’s just wait for the walk signal. But what if walk sign in life never comes. Will we be stuck on this side of the street? Unfortunately many people may think that at least it’s safe here and never take the first step.

Friends, I know it is hard to let go of the fears and doubts. It’s completely natural. In fact, our very survival depends on it. What if the cars were in fact coming, I could have lost my life in the rush. 

There is nothing wrong in being fearful and seeking safety. My point however is that even though there is fear; take the first step in the present moment.

Let your mind know that in the unknown territory, you can discover opportunities to live your dreams. Welcome your doubts, explain them that “I know this is the first time I will be doing this, but I would like to at least try it” and take that first step. 

Tomorrow, tell someone you love them, even though there may not be reciprocal. The friend who keeps insulting you, tell him that you need to set up boundaries. Tell your boss how much you appreciate his efforts and thank him (even though he will think you are acting crazy). Tell your neighbor to shut his dog. Say thank you to the police officer. Try at least one new thing- any new thing or look at something in a new way. Eat ice cream as if it’s a vegetable and eat vegetable as if its ice cream.

Small changes form habits. I have suggested small things but soon you will start seeing beyond the big truck of fear and doubt and start taking steps towards the pathway success!!

Affirmation for releasing fear and doubt: 

Everything I touch is a success

New pathways are opening up for me

I am safe wherever I go

I accept new ways and new perspectives in life

I can see everything clearly

Being Perferct, Being Impossible

We all make mistakes, we are humans and we are bound to make mistakes. One day, I kept count of my reactions to others when they made mistakes. At my work, I discovered that there was an error that could be avoided and I criticized my coworkers. When I was coming home, the trains were not on schedule and I criticized MTA. When I was walking home from the train station, I saw that people were not walking fast enough and I criticized them. I came home and saw that my dad had not put away the recycling and I criticized him. So who am I to criticize others, miss perfect? 

Far from it. The person I criticize most is me. I try my best to minimize errors so as to be the best employee. I was working on something and then all of a sudden thought of something that I was doing before and my heart sank. I thought I had made a big error. I rechecked my work and thanks god, I had not made the error. But when I recovered from the feeling of criticism, I thought why I feel so negative about making mistakes.

I don’t remember what happened in my childhood; perhaps I was criticized for making mistakes. Somehow I have developed a habit of criticizing, others as well as myself. If I do not accept myself even after making mistakes how can I accept others. This is resentment. I want to live in pure love and not in resentment.

I feel too much pressure to be perfect. I have decided to release the need to be perfect. It is impossible to be perfect. Instead I will try to do my best. 

You see, if I become perfect then there will be no evolution, no going forward, no new ideas. If everybody becomes perfect the way I want them to be then there will nothing different; no new ways. Since it is impossible to control others anyway, I have decided to accept others just the way they are. It means no more criticizing others. If someone makes a mistake, its fixable, no worries, no sweat :)

If I make a mistake, its fixable, no worries, no sweat :) I feel so much lighter by using this strategy. 

If you think that others are making too many mistakes and you criticize people more than you appreciate them, go within. See where is it that you are criticizing yourself. If you keep track you will be surprised to see how many times you are criticizing yourself. When you say, “ah, I am so stupid”, “what the hell was I thinking”, “I hate myself for doing this”, then you are criticizing yourself. Every time you make a mistake, say to yourself, it’s fixable. When you respect yourself, you can respect others. 

Your inner subconscious beliefs reflect your outer experiences. 

When you love and accept yourself, you love and accept others. This is pure love and joy.

Criticizing feels heavy and dark. Let it go. Feel lighter. Laugh at mistakes, learn and move on.

Affirmations: I love and accept myself and others with pure love.

I release the need and habit to criticize myself as we as others.

Benefits of Various Foods

Food chart with benefits:

Apples	Protects your heart	Prevents constipation	Blocks diarrhea	Improves lung capacity	Cushions joints
Apricots	Combats cancer	Controls blood pressure	Saves your eyesight	Shields against Alzheimer's	Slows aging process
Artichokes	Aids digestion	Lowers cholesterol	Protects your heart	Stabilizes blood sugar	Guards against liver disease
Avocados	Battles diabetes	Lowers cholesterol	Helps stops strokes	Controls blood pressure	Smoothes skin
Bananas	Protects your heart	Quiets a cough	Strengthens bones	Controls blood pressure	Blocks diarrhea
Beans	Prevents constipation	Helps hemorrhoids	Lowers cholesterol	Combats cancer	Stabilizes blood sugar
Beets	Controls blood pressure	Combats cancer	Strengthens bones	Protects your heart	Aids weight loss
Blueberries	Combats cancer	Protects your heart	Stabilizes blood sugar	Boosts memory	Prevents constipation
Broccoli	Strengthens bones	Saves eyesight	Combats cancer	Protects your heart	Controls blood pressure
Cabbage	Combats cancer	Prevents constipation	Promotes weight loss	Protects your heart	Helps hemorrhoids
Cantaloupe	Saves eyesight	Controls blood pressure	Lowers cholesterol	Combats cancer	Supports immune system
Carrots	Saves eyesight	Protects your heart	Prevents constipation	Combats cancer	Promotes weight loss
Cauliflower	Protects against Prostate Cancer	Combats Breast Cancer	Strengthens bones	Banishes bruises	Guards against heart disease
Cherries	Protects your heart	Combats Cancer	Ends insomnia	Slows aging process	Shields against Alzheimer's
Chestnuts	Promotes weight loss	Protects your heart	Lowers cholesterol	Combats Cancer	Controls blood pressure
Chili peppers	Aids digestion	Soothes sore throat	Clears sinuses	Combats Cancer	Boosts immune system
Figs	Promotes weight loss	Helps stops strokes	Lowers cholesterol	Combats Cancer	Controls blood pressure
Fish	Protects your heart	Boosts memory	Protects your heart	Combats Cancer	Supports immune system
Flax	Aids digestion	Battles diabetes	Protects your heart	Improves mental health	Boosts immune system
Garlic	Lowers cholesterol	Controls blood pressure	Combats cancer	Kills bacteria	Fights fungus
Grapefruit	Protects against heart attacks	Promotes Weight loss	Helps stops strokes	Combats Prostate Cancer	Lowers cholesterol
Grapes	Saves eyesight	Conquers kidney stones	Combats cancer	Enhances blood flow	Protects your heart
Green tea	Combats cancer	Protects your heart	Helps stops strokes	Promotes Weight loss	Kills bacteria
Honey	Heals wounds	Aids digestion	Guards against ulcers	Increases energy	Fights allergies
Lemons	Combats cancer	Protects your heart	Controls blood pressure	Smoothes skin	Stops scurvy
Limes	Combats cancer	Protects your heart	Controls blood pressure	Smoothes skin	Stops scurvy
Mangoes	Combats cancer	Boosts memory	Regulates thyroid	Aids digestion	Shields against Alzheimer's
Mushrooms	Controls blood pressure	Lowers cholesterol	Kills bacteria	Combats cancer	Strengthens bones
Oats	Lowers cholesterol	Combats cancer	Battles diabetes	Prevents constipation	Smoothes skin
Olive oil	Protects your heart	Promotes Weight loss	Combats cancer	Battles diabetes	Smoothes skin
Onions	Reduce risk of heart attack	Combats cancer	Kills bacteria	Lowers cholesterol	Fights fungus
Oranges	Supports immune systems	Combats cancer	Protects your heart	Straightens respiration
Peaches	Prevents constipation	Combats cancer	Helps stops strokes	Aids digestion	Helps hemorrhoids
Peanuts	Protects against heart disease	Promotes Weight loss	Combats Prostate Cancer	Lowers cholesterol	Aggravates  Diverticulitis
Pineapple	Strengthens bones	Relieves colds	Aids digestion	Dissolves warts	Blocks diarrhea
Prunes	Slows aging process	Prevents constipation	Boosts memory	Lowers cholesterol	Protects against heart disease
Rice	Protects your heart	Battles diabetes	Conquers kidney stones	Combats cancer	Helps stops strokes
Strawberries	Combats cancer	Protects your heart	Boosts memory	Calms stress
Sweet potatoes	Saves your eyesight	Lifts mood	Combats cancer	Strengthens bones
Tomatoes	Protects prostate	Combats cancer	Lowers cholesterol	Protects your heart
Walnuts	Lowers cholesterol	Combats cancer	Boosts memory	Lifts mood	Protects against heart disease
Water	Promotes Weight loss	Combats cancer	Conquers kidney stones	Smoothes skin
Watermelon	Protects prostate	Promotes Weight loss	Lowers cholesterol	Helps stops strokes	Controls blood pressure
Wheat germ	Combats Colon Cancer	Prevents constipation	Lowers cholesterol	Helps stops strokes	Improves digestion
Wheat bran	Combats Colon Cancer	Prevents constipation	Lowers cholesterol	Helps stops strokes	Improves digestion
Yogurt	Guards against ulcers	Strengthens bones	Lowers cholesterol	Supports immune systems	Aids digestion

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