Annoying Coworkers!!

The annoying coworkers!!

Yes they are not just mythical creatures, they are the real deal.  You have to face them, no matter where you go. You see, annoying coworkers are same everywhere but somehow we uniquely feel victimized.  Let’s be real, as long as you work in this real world, you will have them.

Jeez, does that mean we have to be annoyed all the time. Well, as everything in life is made of choices, you have a choice either be annoyed or releasing the pattern of being annoyed.

The truth is that everybody in the world is annoying. Yes including you and me. Only difference is that some annoyance can be tolerated and some cannot.

Your children, for example, are in fact very annoying – no? Maybe not to you but there annoyance is tolerable and even appreciated by you. On the other hand, the constantly barking next door dog is annoying and it is unacceptable.

A lot of our family members are annoying and we get annoyed by them but we still want to live with them because we love them.

Annoying coworkers are tolerated but not by choice. However I believe that they can be tolerated if you change your perspective.

First, remember that there is nobody with whom you can get along perfectly. Your spouse/partner probably has some habit that you hate but you tolerate it because there are other traits that you admire more.

Similarly, think of things that you actually appreciate about your annoying coworkers. You may hate your coworker for always picking his nose (gross… I know) but he may be a good worker who always comes in early.

Second, remember that everybody was born great but then life happened. Not everybody was raised the way you did. Their cultures, traditions, and acceptable and unacceptable habits are different that yours. Respect the difference even if you hate it.

If you cannot stand the person then talk to them directly. Explain them that they are a wonderful person but their particular habit makes it hard for you to completely appreciate them. Be prepared to get some backfire if the person you are dealing with is not only annoying but also has not completely matured as an adult. Or, just play this scenario in your head and speak to their higher self. You know that the dust on the gold does not make it less valuable, all you have to do is remove the dust. Unfortunately, you can only remove your own dusts. Clean that dusts from your eyes and look at that annoying coworker with neutrality. I say neutrality because although looking at them with love can help tremendously, it is almost impossible to love someone suddenly when you hate them or their habits.

If you can, change your seats or put a calendar between them and you. If you can complain anonymously to your HR department then you should. E.g. listening to radio loud or keep spitting in the trash can are unacceptable habits.

Remember that being annoying is different than being unprofessional. No unprofessional act should be tolerated as it can be a liability to your company.

Repeat the following affirmations to get along with all of your coworkers:

My coworkers are easy to get along with

My work place is productive and fun

All my coworkers are professional and act in professional manner

I enjoy my workplace

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My friends, every moment matters and this is the moment when you have decided that you do not have to work with people who do not appreciate you. But this is also a moment to remember that you have attracted this situation. What sort of feelings did you emit to attract this kind of coworker? This is not your fault but by taking the responsibility for attracting things in your life, you take the control to change them.

This is the moment to take control in your work space. Your work space is divine because it has YOU in it. You feel grateful to come to work every day. You receive fair compensation for what you do. You have probably made some amazing friends in this place. You are thrilled to have a job that requires your services. You are needed. This place is better because of you. It is same with your coworkers. You may not be able to see or feel it. However, at some point they were thrilled to have this job but now it is just a routine for them. More than doing what they love they do their job because if they don’t, they will get fired. The fear or ego has replaced the excitement and love for this divine place. But don’t feel sad. There is nothing you can do about their perspective. They are in control of their lives and you are of your own.

Think good things about your job. May it be having your own voicemail or working in the loving neighborhood. Maybe it is the convenience from home or the pay check. Maybe it is one of your coworker or the satisfaction you receive from giving your services.

Do not do lousy job because nobody is appreciating it. Remember that you are always giving out feelings that will attract more of it. So give out feelings that someone IS appreciating your work. Your work is always recognized positively. In the meetings you are prepared, you are the star. People come to you not because they want your help but because they want to learn from you. How can you be such so happy, positive and productive in the depressing environment? Because you can. Because you made a choice.  Because you are in control of your own life, not your coworkers. Soon you will find that you will attract people of your own caliber. And even if you don’t, you know you that nothing and nobody can stop you from living every moment to the fullest and you certainly know how ;).

Forgiveness!!

As a firm believer in Law of Attraction, I believe that everything in my life is attracted by me. Sometimes I attract joy and sometimes I attract sadness. However, this does not mean that I should keep feeling guilty about bad situations in my life. When someone disrespects me, it does not automatically mean that I have no respect for myself but that somewhere I felt “not good enough”. This feeling my not have lasted for very long time but it was there for a few moment.

Sometimes we do things without realizing its effect. E.g. you may steal paper clips from your work, thinking nobody cares but when you realize that someone has stolen something that is important to you, you care. You don’t immediately connect two situations but there may be a correlation. When you steal something from your, no matter how small, you are telling the Universe that you cannot afford a little bit of consideration towards your workplace and you do not have enough money to buy such petty things. Your feelings will return to you multifold. Someone may steal your valuables without considering your feelings. These valuables don’t have to be money or material things; they can be your feelings. So next time when you get hurt, ask yourself what feelings you gave out to attract this situation? Did you steal petty things or someone’s pride without considering the consequences?

Everybody has a choice to think and to act in whichever way they please. When someone has done wrong to you they have exercised their right to choose. It’s rather unfortunate that they did not consider your feelings. However, now it is done, whatever it was - it’s already done to you. There is nothing that you can do to change that. You can take revenge but that will not “fix” the situation or take you back in time when it had not happened. It has happened, just like that. You have attracted it but it is not your fault.

So what do you do now? If you are a spiritual person, you may feel, well only thing to do is to forgive. Yes. Forgiveness is necessary but it is very difficult. It is hard to forgive someone who has done unjust to you. It was not fair to you. Nobody should be able to get away with what happened to you.

But forgiveness does not mean that you are accepting what happened it only means that you are releasing yourself from that situation. Unfortunately, it is difficult to forgive and release yourself or the other person freely.

I believe that as a human being with feelings, directly forgiving someone after an unfair incident should not be expected. So, please don’t feel bad for hating the person who did wrong to you. It is normal. The best way to move past something is to go through it. You cannot cross the river without going in it first. You can build a bridge but you will still see the river. River isn’t going anywhere as long as you want to pass it, no matter how you pass it.

In order to move past any bad experience, the first step is to acknowledge that you did not deserve the wrongdoing. Nobody deserves it.

Next is to remember some simple points:

It is OK to be angry. By being angry, you are expressing your feelings. You are NOT a bad person for feeling this way. You are a wonderful person who deserves nothing but love and joy.

Don’t try to forgive the person just yet.

Think of the situation that happened, I know you want to forget it, but think about it anyway.

Let’s say someone stole your idea at work or someone molested you in the bus or your father beat you when you were only 5. All these situations are terrible, unfortunately worse has happened to people and they are the real deals on this Earth.

Look at the scene as a third person. See your face and expressions. Feel the anxiety or fear you were feeling at that time. Now tell your old self:  “You are going to be just fine. Don’t mind the other person who is being wrong. He or she does not know you the way I do. You are going to forget about it soon. The future will NOT be affected because of this incident. Everything is always in our hands.” Try to send love into that situation, specifically to yourself. Now forgive YOURSELF for being in that situation. Remind yourself that this could not have been avoided. There is no need to feel guilty about it anymore. What happened was wrong but now you have moved on. The future life is still good.

Now release the feeling of shame and guilt. More than angry at the person who did wrong to you, you are angry at yourself. Release your anger slowly. Remember that this situation did not change your future. Your future is still safe and waiting for you.

Now think of your present life. What is it that you can do today? Right now? Can you start over?

Yes, we can always start over. The sun always comes out in the morning.

At the end, you don’t need to forgive the other person because apparently he or she did not even affect your life. You are in control of your life and not the other person. Whatever happened was an experience. Life is full of experiences – some good and some bad. You had a bad experience and now it is gone. You have learned what needed to learn and moved on.

Only person you ever need to forgive is yourself. When you practice the above steps you will realize that there is no need to forgive others because they were unable change anything in your life. Yes what they did was wrong but you will not suffer because of them. You are sensible and you will take sensible steps to prevent that from happening again.  

My friends, every moment matters and this is the moment when you have decided to let go of the past. Congratulations for that. Live your life to the fullest. Nothing can and nothing will hold you back. You are so amazing that sometimes you amaze yourself. You are a true gift to the world; you did not come here by chance. This world needed you. Whether you realize it or not, this world would have never been same without you. You are here now; you know your true worth. Even if your had forgotten about it for a little while, you remember it now. In this moment you are determining to live your life to the fullest. You do that by not laying low but by being yourself, by expressing yourself and by converting your ideas into inspirations, inspirations into actions and actions into inspirations to others. And most importantly, by forgiving and moving on.